How To Get Over a Breakup
There are certain moments in someone’s life where they get hit hard.
Those moments range from a death of a loved on, getting fired, being accused of something they didn’t do…..and a breakup.
‘A breakup?? What’s so bad about that?’
It’s a tough moment champ.
‘Yea right. Quit being soft Armani.’
I’m not, I’m being real.
The thing with breakups is that it brings out a deeper side to you.
It brings out your human side.
I’ve seen the toughest dudes become shattered when they had to wave a permanent goodbye to the love of their life.
Let me explain what happens & how you overcome this dark moment in your life.
Breakups can make or break you.
Let me shed some insights into how you can use the breakup to turn your life around for the best.
The Birth of a Breakup
You are dating a person for a while.
It’s been a few months to a few years.
You two have gone from liking each other to loving each other.
Y’all have been thru the honeymoon stage, taken trips, created memories and even…..
Talked about marriage?
Life seems to be going great & you can’t imagine the other person not being in your life.
You shudder at the thought of your loved one being with someone else.
But you shoo away those thought because you know that it will not happen to you.
Until one day, your worst nightmare comes true.
You two break up.
The invisible bond of love that held you together is no more.
A few potential reasons for a breakup:
- Content– Either one or both of y’all got content & quit putting in effort to make the relationship work.
- Cheating– One person cheated on the other & broke all the trust in the process.
- Love fades– Not malicious, but the feeling fizzles out. This can often be tied to point 1.
- Distance– Long distance is doable, but only for the determined. Many couples end once distance takes place.
These are just a few reasons for the breakup.
Side Effects of A Breakup
Getting over a loved one is tough as fuck.
I’m about to give you a morbid analogy, but oh well.
A breakup is very similar to coping with the death of a loved one.
‘Get the fuck out of here.’
Nope, dead serious.
A few side effects include:
· Emotional roller coasters
· Being plagued with ‘what ifs’
· Loss of appetite
· Loss of sleep
How Long Does it take to Get Over a Breakup?
Depends on plenty of variables.
There is no set time for you to get over it, you just take it day by day.
‘Well that’s a shitty response Armani.’
But I have good news.
‘And what is that bucko?’
You can speed up your recovery process.
I am going to give you a few tips to get over a breakup.
If you follow my tips, you will one day realize that this relationship ending was one of the best things ever.
You are going to see what it means to turn pain into power.
Let us begin.
1. Commit to the breakup
Spoiler alert: but ex’s often try to come back.
And what happens is that people are foolish enough to go back to their ex & see if it’ll work out.
The ex comes back into your life with their best behavior, puts on an act & y’all give it another try.
But as the days pile up, the old fights that tore y’all apart start coming back.
And your ex begins acting they way the initially did.
Eventually, y’all 2 end up breaking up & you have a whole lot of your time wasted.
Commit to the breakup & know that you are never going back.
Go all in.
2. Cut off all ties & get rid of their memories
Delete all their pictures, throw out their gifts & eliminate anything that reminds you of them.
-You’re doing this because those gifts & pictures spark emotions in you. And those emotions set a chain of thoughts regarding your ex. No bueno if you’re trying to move on.
Then block them on social media & block their number too.
-The last thing you want to do is stalk their social media & stay updated on their life or drunk call them.
This step starts of the entire healing process.
Note: If y’all have kids together & can’t do this step, all good, just proceed to the next one.
3. Refrain from Alcohol & Weed
Alcohol & weed are going to get you in your feelings.
This will cause you to go on a chain reaction of thoughts & ‘what if’ scenarios.
This has your mind pulling back while you need to be pushing forward more than ever.
If you want to move on faster, push alcohol & weed to the side.
4. Get your ass to the gym
In this world, there will be a lot people that lie to you, leave you & hurt you.
But the weights will always be by your side.
Okay enough of the poetic shit.
Here’s some scientific stuff:
A broken heart leads to stress.
Stress leads to your brain releasing cortisol.
Excess cortisol leads to excess blood being pushed into your muscles.
This leads to muscle aches & headaches.
Lifting weights releases endorphins in your brain.
Endorphins are feel good chemicals that lightens your mood.
This is why you feel happier after a great workout.
Don’t go every now and then homie.
Soon, the gym will become your safe haven.
By the way, not sure if you know this, but many body builders & fitness freaks were born thru heartbreaks.
Use this info to push your body to new realms.
5. Find a Creative Hobby
At this stage, you have a lot of emotions within you.
Which is why you need to release those emotions on a creative channel.
Spend time finding your creative channel.
A few recommendations from me are:
· Start an ecommerce business
· Create a Youtube channel
· Start a blog
· Learn painting
· Learn an instrument
· Go to dance class
· Take improv classes
You get the point.
Every time you get done with the creative hobby, you will feel a level of emotional weight removed from you.
6. Use a Journal as a Therapist or a see a Therapist
Your journal is your best friend at this stage, so write in it.
You can be vulnerable if you need to be.
Pretty sure you want to say some stuff that you don’t feel comfortable saying out loud.
So write it your journal.
Writing is one of the best ways to deal with destructive emotions.
It will become your therapy.
Or you can even go to a therapist.
If you’re someone who is in college, pretty sure they offer free therapy sessions.
Or invest in your moving on process & shell out some money on a therapist.
The sessions may be expensive, but your sanity is worth it.
Plus, I offer emotional intelligence sessions for breakups. To book a session, submit your form here.
7. Be Social even when you don’t want to be
Go out & be social.
You’ll be very tempted to stay home all day and wallow in misery.
Go catch up with friends, call your parents & join a few clubs.
‘Should I begin dating?’
Begin dating once you have moved on.
Don’t run away from your heartbreak by immediately jumping onto another relationship.
It may work out in the beginning, but your unhealed emotions will come back & will make the relationship difficult.
Go out with the intention of being social & talking to everyone.
No need to chase at the moment.
You’ll begin to attract some dope people into your life.
8. Learn your Breakup Lessons
This part may be tough, but you have to learn the tough lessons.
This will include you finding where you were wrong in the relationship.
Tame your ego & learn how you could have carried yourself better, find red flags that you overlooked & other takeaways.
A failed relationship leads to more lessons than you can ever imagine.
It’ll teach you so much about life that your mind will be BLOWN.
Lessons that you’ll never get from a book.
So learn the lessons.
9. Commit to Leveling Up for Life
Want to know a secret?
The dark emotions never go away.
But with time, your mind becomes stronger than the dark emotions.
When your mind becomes stronger than the dark emotions, that’s when you have moved on.
Till then, I just want you to take it day by day.
Make today better than yesterday & tomorrow better than today.
If you are able to do that, you will grow stronger & stronger.
And the more you level up, the more your confidence will skyrocket.
Within some time, you will notice the pain melting away because your mind has become so strong.
And at that point?
You will find it laughable to ever think about getting back with your ex again.
Your newly leveled up life has you attracting new people that put your ex to shame!
Keep going to the top.
Get Over Your Breakup & Alter your life
Getting over a breakup builds character like none other.
Most people run away from conflicts that are present in the external world.
But when the conflicts are in the internal world, there is no running.
Either you deal with it like an OG or go on a downward spiral.
The ones who go on a downward spiral end up playing catching up for a huge portion of their life.
But the ones who deal with it level up to Godlike Levels.
Your future is just getting started from this moment.
You will get over this breakup & realize how strong you were all along.
Now get off your ass & apply these tips.
Turn your pain into power.
Turn your sadness into understanding.
And turn your rock bottom moment into glory.
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– ArmaniTalks 🎙️🔥