The Feeling of Anxiety
The feeling of anxiety is debilitating for many.
And it causes a loss of enthusiasm for life.
When you picture your life, you recognize when you are enjoying it & when you aren’t, based on your enthusiasm.
Low energy & a feeling doubt cripple that.
Anxiety is not just mental…
It is not just emotional.
But it also physical as well.
When you break that part down, and digest it, there is some clarity.
During feelings of low energy, we have a lot of doubt regarding the task.
Our ego doesn’t like to feel embarrassed.
So whatever task is causing us anxiety, will be stamped by the ego. And that act will have tension in the future.
You gotta realize one big part.
Anxiety can get the best of you unless you become AWARE of it.
It’s as though anxiety and awareness cannot coexist with one another.
One always overpowers the other.
If that’s your option, then let’s choose awareness.
But you don’t get awareness willy nilly.
You get it via pain & knowledge.
In today’s blog post, you’ll get a little bit of both.
You may feel the pain. Good.
Allow the knowledge of the feeling of anxiety to clarify your understanding of the internal world.
Emotional intelligence gives you depth.
And the depth you gain gives you confidence for your future. Let’s begin.
Why Do We Get Anxiety?
We get anxiety based on perception.
Perception is our interpretation based on our 5 senses.
We input information, and process however we do.
The processing depends heavily on our belief systems.
Humans have developed an ego over generations.
An ego gives us our sense of identity.
A tamed ego can be your best friend.
But an untamed ego can make your life a living hell.
Anxiety is born via an untamed ego.
‘What do you mean by an untamed ego bro?’
It’s when you make yourself the center of everyone else’s world.
‘What’s the difference between an untamed ego and a tamed one?’
- With a tamed ego, you see the FULL picture and understand your place within that picture.
- However, with an untamed ego, you just see the pixel (yourself) & mistake it for the full picture.
Your untamed ego leads to the Spotlight Effect.
In summary, the Spotlight Effect is when you feel as though there is an imaginary spotlight over you.
This makes you extra cautious of your moves.
When you are extra cautions of your moves, the next psychological phenomena kicks in…
The Illusion of Transparency.
The Illusion of Transparency is when you THINK that your emotions are leaking out to the public.
Also known as those times when you wonder if you look nervous or ugly.
A combination of Spotlight Effect and Illusion of Transparency has you terrified of making mistakes & being judged for it.
Which causes you to ignore the Pratfall Effect.
‘The Pratfall Effect?’
Yep… The Pratfall Effect states that humans like humans with imperfections & flaws.
These people are easier to relate too.
However, your chain of fears has created an imitation version of you.
A fake perfection persona which causes you to meet what you were trying to avoid:
How To Break Out the Feeling of Anxiety Loop
Anxiety as a whole isn’t a bad thing.
It can actually be good in many ways.
There was a portion of my public speaking journey where I had gotten a little cocky.
I began thinking I had it ‘all figured out.’
That couldn’t have been further from the truth.
One speech, I ended up going in unprepared.
And ended up bombing.
The speech was very low energy & seemed to lack enthusiasm.
I realized that day that the nerves I normally felt leading up to a speech allowed me to attain a hyper-focus level.
And that focus is what allowed me to bring out my best self.
In the real world though, too much of anything becomes bad.
- A little bit of anxiety allows you to feel ENERGY.
- But too much of anxiety makes you feel crippled.
‘Why does this happen?’
It happens because you suppress rather than make yourself aware of your feelings.
Remember earlier how I said anxiety and awareness cannot exist at the same time?
Well, then you need to become more aware.
You’ll never become FULLY aware.
But awareness is a lifelong journey. That’s what keeps it fun.
However, the more aware that you DO become, the more you feel in control.
‘Gotcha bro. But what do I become aware of?’
You become aware of your internal world.
That’s the first step in breaking out of the anxiety loop.
Bringing Clarity to Darkness
A lot of anxiety is caused by ambiguity.
Your brain doesn’t like ambiguity.
And when it does have ambiguity, it begins to overthink.
Imagine you start clicking a bunch of buttons on your microwave.
That’s not a good usage of the tool…
Your brain likes clarity.
If you want a quick little trick… try this:
Next time you feel anxiety, write in 1 sentence why you feel the way you do.
I encourage 1 sentence because it forces you to be succinct.
And I encourage you to write because it forces you to bring WORDS to your FEELINGS.
Try it & you’ll notice your anxiety melt…
There are a lot of principles behind this little exercise.
But the main principle is that clarity is what you are going for.
Any thought that you get in your mind generates a FEELING in your body.
Rather than focusing so much on the thought, focus more on the feeling.
You’ll notice something.
The feelings don’t hold any narratives.
Thoughts hold narratives. But feelings are completely neutral.
The mind and body are connected.
Body influences the mind & mind influences the body.
But since your body is capable of understanding via your 5 senses, it’s much easier to influence.
FEEL the physical sensations associated with the thoughts.
This allows you to surprisingly bring clarity to the darkness.
Understanding your body allows you to understand your mind.
Rather than multiple thoughts floating around…
You are now more grounded & have a FILTER to which thoughts matter and which don’t.
Building Your Emotional Literacy
One of the main reasons a lot of people suffer from the feeling of anxiety is due to lacking emotional literacy.
Ambiguity causes a lot of anxiety.
And when you don’t have the right words in your toolbox, you are unable to make sense of your internal world.
Language allows us to slice up reality into bits that apply to our perception.
I can’t even imagine life without language.
Once you have gotten to know your body, that’s when you need to assign WORDS to the FEELINGS.
That’s emotional literacy 101.
Rather than just feeling ‘happy, ‘mad’, ‘sad’.
You now have more depth.
Now you can feel:
Happy & confused.
Anxious and excited.
Mad & contemplative etc.
Having enhanced emotional literacy allows you to feel more grounded rather than a bag floating in the wind.
You become more like a tree.
The more you get in the habit of FEELING your sensations & using your mind to assign WORDS to the feelings, the more confident you become.
That’s when you start realizing ‘anxiety’ and ‘excitement’ have a lot of the same physical sensations.
Almost identical in many ways.
Realizing this insight for yourself allows you to choose your words more carefully.
Instead of just going with what your environment implies you should think.
Things are different now.
Your internal world holds the power.
Overcome Anxiety & Take Control Over Your Life
The feeling of anxiety in doses can keep you alert.
But unfortunately, most have an overloaded amount of this feeling.
In the most technologically gifted era of human history, we seem the most emotionally out of it.
So change your story.
We have a lot of material possessions in the external world.
But now it’s time to look within.
Emotional intelligence is a game of what is within, not what is outside.
Learning to understand your emotions allows you to control your emotions.
And learning to control your emotions allows you to make sense of your reality.
Overcome anxiety, & build your confidence.
Once you get your enthusiasm back for life, that is when you KNOW that you are back on the right track.
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– ArmaniTalks 🎙️🔥