What Are Some Advantages to Being Disagreeable?
The term “disagreeable” gets a bad rep.
The agreeable person is easy to get along with, while the disagreeable person ruffles feathers.
A lot of times, being disagreeable is not the smart thing to do.
Especially when you’re a rebel without a cause.
However, when you are a rebel with a cause, being disagreeable is a useful skillset.
Because there will be plenty of times when society is trying to talk you out of something big.
If you were agreeable, then you won’t make any changes.
You’ll just buckle your knee at the first sight of conflict.
On the other hand, when you know how to be disagreeable without creating an enemy, you’ll make monumental change.
Restaurant Thought Experiment
Imagine a restaurant run by 3 brothers.
Right now, whenever a server gets tips, they put it in the tip box.
At the end of the day, the 3 brothers equally divide the money in the tip box for themselves and the other servers.
It doesn’t matter which server bought in the most tips.
Ultimately, every server gets the money equally.
One day, one of the brothers, Ramon, notices that this setup is unfair.
‘Julie is bringing in way more tips than Frankie. How come at the end of the day, Frankie gets as much tip money as Julie?’
Ramon lets the other 2 brothers know how unfair this setup is.
The other 2 brothers are like:
‘Ramon, chill! Who cares?? Ultimately, we all get money too.’
Ramon and his brothers are getting tip money because they are the ones who are providing a venue for the servers to have a job.
They believe they deserve it.
Something about this doesn’t seem right.
Ramon’s gut is alerting him on something…
What is it?
Big Changes Are Coming
One day, Ramon gathers the 2 brothers in a meeting and says:
‘From here on out, we are not going to divide tips. Every server keeps the tips they make.’
The brothers are shocked.
That means they aren’t going to get extra cash at the end of the day.
Ramon is in charge of restaurant management.
He has the final say.
Once Ramon lets the other servers know about the change, the lazy servers are furious.
The handouts have officially ended.
Ramon now has 2 enemies:
- His brothers & the lazy workers.
Is he going to fold at the first sign of conflict or is he going to stand tall?
Growing Pains
For the first few weeks, things are hectic.
The star servers are pulling in more tips than ever.
However, the lazy servers are just whining.
The whining is spreading to the 2 brothers.
The 2 brothers attack Ramon for his abrupt change.
Ramon has every reason to quit and change his mind.
However, he doesn’t because of one big reason:
- FLASHES OF INSIGHT.
Every now and then, a person comes to him and says:
‘The service here has been great as of late. Even from that one waiter right there…He’s normally a bit aloof and lazy, but as of late, he’s been way more attentive.’
Ramon gets comments like this every now and then.
Not always, but in spurts.
This is an important concept to keep in mind.
Ramon can bend the knee and be agreeable because the comments he gets all the time is how bad his management style is.
The comments he gets in spurts is that the service is getting better.
He continues to be disagreeable and listens to the “every now and then” comments.
The Tsunami Hits
As a few months goes by, there is a massive change in morale.
The bad servers begin polishing up their behavior.
They see how much money the good servers are pulling in by wooing the customers and giving them a great dining experience.
So, the bad servers try learning from the good servers.
The good servers are willing to teach and impart their wisdom.
Just like that, the servers are bonding.
In addition to that, the great service has led to an influx of positive reviews.
More people are coming to the restaurant!!
The 2 brothers who were against Ramon now view him as a clairvoyant.
‘Ramon, how did you know this was going to work??
The thing is that Ramon didn’t know.
He just listened to his gut on this one.
When Being Disagreeable is a Good Thing
If there were no disagreeable people on this planet, we wouldn’t have innovation.
You don’t get something like Uber without being disagreeable.
Everyone disses the former CEO, Travis Kalanick, as being a jerk.
My counterpoint is:
‘Can you disrupt the archaic taxi industry without being a jerk?’
I doubt it.
You need to be gritty and a fighter.
Being a fighter comes with downsides:
- Hard to get along with, moody, stubborn.
However, it comes with upsides.
The upside with Uber is that now you can get a car at your front door with the click of a button.
Being disagreeable is great when you’re an entrepreneur or you’re trying to introduce a change that you don’t have much evidence for.
Steve Jobs would always say that the Blackberry was so ugly.
Back then, the Blackberry was the gold standard for a phone.
What do you mean its ugly??
He means that it’s ugly!
And he will do something about it…
He did do something about it.
*Cough* iPhone *cough*
Know When to be Disagreeable
There are times you need to be agreeable and play to someone’s ego.
Other times, you need to stand up for yourself.
Don’t be one of those guys who is so nice because you’re afraid to take a stance.
If you have the proper info, then pull the trigger on your opinion!
The world will fight you on it.
And they won’t only fight you for a day.
They’ll fight you for days, weeks, months, and years.
You’ll begin to doubt yourself.
The overly agreeable person will fold.
While the disagreeable person will continue to fight.
One day, the cards will fall where they will fall.
Then you can decide whether being disagreeable was worth it.
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– ArmaniTalks 
