Avoid Finger Pointing While Public Speaking
A few years ago, I was watching this heated debate between Anthony Wiener and Joe Scarborough on MSNBC.
They were shouting back and forth.
Eventually, there was a point when Anthony Wiener pointed his finger at Joe while delivering a message.
Joe seemed alarmed and said:
‘Hey, watch who you point your finger at!’
I’ve heard of the middle finger being an offensive hand gesture, but pointing the index finger at someone was offensive too?
As a matter of fact, yes.
A pointed finger is not pleasant to the perception.
Don’t be surprised if people have a visceral reaction like Joe did when you point at them.
Why Finger Pointing Isn’t Pleasant
If you are pointing a finger at a bullet in a PowerPoint Presentation, then that’s fine.
The finger is simply being used as a guiding tool then.
Still, I don’t believe that’s the optimal strategy.
I’ll share a better strategy shortly.
If you’re constantly finger-pointing at the audience, it will leave a poor taste in their mouths.
Mainly because the finger-point is a SHARP move.
It looks like a knife.
At first, it’s not noticeable.
Over time, the sharp finger becomes a dagger that makes the audience feel repulsed at the speaker.
‘Why is it easy to finger-point, Armani?”
The reason it’s easy to finger-point is because it generates motion most efficiently.
As a public speaker, we know that we shouldn’t keep our hands in our pockets.
This just feels like common sense.
So, we use our hands.
But we use it to the minimum.
Because using the maximum potential of the hands requires a lot of confidence and comfort.
If there are 300 people staring at you, then it is hard to feel comfortable…
Open Palms Are the Winner’s Move
Despite feeling uncomfortable, force yourself to open your palms.
Get ALL the other fingers engaged.
(Pro tip: Soften the thumbs. When we open our palms, one or both thumbs may stick out a lot. Soften it by bending the thumbs more rather than allowing them to be straight and perpendicular to the other fingers. Straight thumbs create a similar sharp motion as the finger-point).
When humans see your palms, they automatically trust you faster.
But all parts of the palms should be visible, not just one sharp index finger.
In addition to the open palms building perception among others, it also builds perception with ourselves!
Displaying open palms is similar to standing up straight.
There is an instant burst of confidence.
That confidence creates a positive feedback loop.
In the future, you want to show off your palms more.
Using the Fingers
If you ever have the time, watch Tony Robbins talk.
He uses his fingers a lot.
Tony shows his palms, which is great.
But when he shows his fingers, it takes his message to the next level.
When he uses his fingers during a talk, it feels like he GRABS the audience’s attention and won’t let go until his message is complete.
I watched a few old-school Tony Robbins videos when he was in his 20s.
He didn’t use his fingers that much then.
He was an open palms sort of guy.
So, I think the more confidence he built for his message, the more his fingers organically came to life.
If you don’t use your fingers too much yet, don’t sweat it.
Maybe in the future, you will.
Different Types of Finger Pointing
Whenever I’m feeling lethargic and dehydrated, I finger-point more.
I don’t only finger-point with my index finger though…
Sometimes, I do it with my pinky.
I never knew I finger-pointed with my pinky!!
One day, my fraternity brother from Arizona was visiting and we had a get-together in Ybor City.
After a long day, we all went to a coffee house.
One of the fraternity brothers made a couple of Snapchats.
I watched the Snapchats back later that day and saw that I kept pointing my pinky.
Not once, but a few times!
I’d point my pinky when asking for coffee, pointing at a brother, and while drinking the coffee.
I felt embarrassed.
- Pointing with the index finger makes a person look mean.
- Pointing with the pinky makes a person look like a sissy!
I never knew I did this motion until I saw it on tape.
Luckily, I built awareness of this issue, and I was able to fix it.
If you’re someone who is reading this, then you want to ask yourself which situations make you finger-point a lot.
What’s your inner state like?
During the Ybor trip, I was finger-pointing a lot because I was dehydrated.
It was 97 degrees, and we had been walking around all day.
That dehydration made me less effective when utilizing my body.
Other times, people finger-point a lot when they are nervous.
Due to the nervousness, they make their body small.
Rather than using their whole palms, they only use specific fingers.
Perception Works in Strange Ways
The more you believe in your message, the more your palms come to life.
The palms are a great tool to amplify your message.
The opposite is also true.
Have you ever seen a speaker who moved their hands too much?
It was distracting right?
‘Yes, it was.’
Hands can easily distract the audience from the message.
If we are constantly pointing, then the audience will feel a distaste.
They won’t know why.
It’ll just be a visceral reaction like Joe had that day.
In a heated debate, if we are pointing left and right, then the other person may snap.
They FEEL like a knife is being pointed at them.
Even though this feeling isn’t grounded in reality, it doesn’t need to be.
Perception works in strange ways.
Open up your palms, my friend.
That’s when a sharp motion blossoms into an inviting motion.
Open palms are the way to go.
Over time, don’t be surprised if your fingers become more animated too.
