Why you Fear the Audience: Nervous While Public Speaking

Why you Fear the Audience: Nervous While Public Speaking

 

Do you have a speech coming up?

And you are very nervous?

 

Well, you’re not alone.

This is a common issue for a lot of people.

 

The thing is that speech anxiety is caused by different reasons.

One reason could be that you didn’t properly prepare for the speech.

 

Another reason could be because you feel like you’re not a public speaker.

Overall, you consider yourself a shy fellow.

 

And another reason is because you subconsciously feel like the audience wants you to do poorly.

As if they will celebrate your loss.

 

Today, we are going to be discussing the speech anxiety that is caused by a fear of the audience.

 

Why do we think this group wants us to fail?

Is this narrative remotely accurate?

What can be done about it?

 

This will be a few questions asked & answered in order to help you deal with being nervous while public speaking.

 

Where the Media Played with Our Minds

 

You ever seen that one TV show where a comedian got booed off stage?

Or maybe it wasn’t a TV show.

It was a real event.

 

There was a comedian who did their best…

But unfortunately, their best was not enough.

Dave Chappelle was one of the comedians who shared a story about getting booed in one of his shows.

 

Added to this, there are other sitcoms & movies amplifying the process of getting booed.

Factor in the negativity bias of our brains, our mind ends up latching onto this narrative.

 

What if we get booed?

 

I’m not saying getting booed does not happen.

However, for a majority of public speakers, this is very rare.

 

In the context of comedy, we need to factor in the environment.

A lot of comedy shows have alcoholic beverages pouring left and right.

People are lit.

 

Comparing their circumstance to giving a speech at work is not one and the same.

 

And still, in the case of comedy, unless you are REALLY bad, booing is not the norm either.

This is a narrative that we need to learn to deal with.

Does the audience really want the speaker to fail?

 

Viewing Yourself as the Audience Member

 

Let me ask you a question.

Did you ever actively want a speaker to fail?

‘Umm…not really.’

Why not?

‘I don’t know. That never even came as a thought. Heck, I would want them to do well since I am in the audience. I want a good experience.’

Yessir.

 

There was a moment a couple of years ago when I saw a speaker forget their talk in their Toastmasters Icebreaker Speech.

The Icebreaker is the first speech that a member has to give.

 

Well, the audience clearly saw that this fellow was nervous while public speaking.

This guy was choking the talk

 

Well, something unique happened.

‘What?’

Everyone sat up straight.

 

People sat up straight & seemed more focused.

Softened up their face too.

Had a gentle smile with a slight head nod implying….

‘Go on. No need to be nervous. We are listening.’

 

This happened subconsciously.

The other members in the audience not only did not want the speaker to fail.

-They actively wanted the speaker to do well.

 

Subconsciously, our human side often wants the best for others.

Our ego can cover up compassion.

But compassion is rarely taught.

We are just put in positions where the darkness subsides & the natural light is capable of shining.

 

Treat the Audience Like You’re Doing them A Favor

 

A lot of the times, we view it as:

Us VERSUS the Audience.

 

While in reality, that’s not remotely the case.

This is when the logical “this or that” thinking mind is creating an enemy out of thin air.

 

The goal is to view the audience as an extension of you.

The Audience AND I.

 

Once we have framed them as an extension of us, like an extra arm, alien status…

We want to act as though we are the ones doing them a favor.

 

A person who suffers from intense speech anxiety is like:

‘Gee whiz!! I really hope the audience likes me.’

 

This individual is already framing themselves like the lower tiered individual.

They are more focused on taking rather than giving.

 

FLIP IT.

 

Focus more on:

‘I already have amazing valuable insights in my talk. Might as well hook the audience up.’

 

This frames you as the higher social valued individual.

You are like the parent who is feeding the baby with a spoon.

Weird example, but you get the point.

 

Focus on your talk!

 

Picturing the End Result

 

By focusing on our talk, we create a BRIDGE.

Before it was:

Us VERSUS the audience.

 

But when you focus on your talk, this creates the bridge between the two parties.

Me <-Talk-> Audience.

 

Automatically, the predominant focus is off of you.

Treat the talk like a human in itself.

-Make it valuable.

-Amplify it with knowledge, humor, and storytelling.

-Then deliver that.

 

To take it even a level further, picture the audience’s faces after you’re done giving the talk.

A sense of awe.

 

‘Whoa, I was not expecting that talk to be THAT good!’

^Convert this sentence into imagery.

 

By seeing the imagery of the end results, the subconscious mind will begin to associate positive feelings with the audience.

This is when the audience truly becomes an extension of your identity.

Like a 3rd arm.

 

Connecting With The Audience

 

The audience is not the enemy.

Instead, the limiting beliefs of the audience are the enemy.

 

Keep taking the time to reflect on the moments when you were an audience member.

How did you want the speaker to perform?

 

By viewing yourself as the audience member, you are able to strip away the negative labels regarding audience members.

 

PS: Stop consuming negative content regarding public speaking.

The general media thrives off negativity and fear-mongering.

Just because a speaker got booed before doesn’t mean it’s the norm.

 

From there, it’s all about the talk.

Focus on the speech.

Bring it to life by treating it like a human.

A human who is smart, funny & knows how to paint the picture.

 

Being nervous is normal for public speaking.

But with practice, the nerves slowly become a distant thing of the past.

 

Then the nerves are reborn.

But this time, the nerves in public speaking are transmuted into the energy which adds FIRE to your movements.

That’s the Pokemon evolving in real time.

 

For more practical communication insights, subscribe to my free daily newsletter.

 

– ArmaniTalks 🎙️🔥

 

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