5 Tips to Control your Anger
Your anger can be your best friend or your worst enemy.
It all depends on the perception that you set for it.
Do you use your anger as an excuse to throw a temper tantrum or to produce?
Your answer to that question will show whether anger is your best friend or worst enemy.
In this post, I want to explain what anger really is & how you can control it.
But I want to take it a level further & show you how to PRODUCE with it .
In my eyes, anger is one of the most unique emotions out there & needs to be leveraged.
With that being said, let us enter the wonderful world of emotional intelligence.
What is anger?
Anger is an emotion that indicates a sense of displeasure.
But let’s delve deeper.
To understand anger in a more nuanced light, you need to be able to distinguish between emotions and feelings.
‘I thought emotions and feelings were the same thing?’
Feelings are the physical sensations your body produces & emotions are your perception of those feelings.
When we think anger, we automatically go to the perception.
We think, ‘anger is bad because it indicates a sense of displeasure.’
But in order to leverage anger, you need to focus on the FEELINGS before the emotions.
Once you can do that, then your perception of anger will go from negative to neutral.
And when your perception switches to neutral, you can use anger to produce a lot of masterpieces.
But how do you focus more on the feeling rather than the emotion?
By getting out of your head & into the present moment.
When something makes you angry & you keep focusing on getting revenge, you stay in your head & recondition a negative perception towards the emotion.
But when something makes you angry & you let it slide so you can focus on the present, you focus on the feelings.
In order to make the mental transition, apply the following 5 practical tips.
Tip # 1 – Slow & Silent Breaths
In order to control your anger, being present is a must.
Your breath will prevent you from making impulsive decisions & allow you to engage your logic.
Engaging your logic is huge because rather than making a short sighted reaction, you think bigger picture.
The breaths slow down your movements & allow you to make a rational decision that you can feel proud of.
Your breath is the remote controller for your emotions, so dial it at your will.
Tip # 2- Focus on the physical sensations not what caused the anger
When you focus on what caused you to be angry, you begin plotting your revenge.
When you focus on the physical sensations from your anger, you remain present.
Remaining present WHILE you’re angry allows you to understand yourself on a much deeper level.
You are able to understand that anger is not the boogeyman.
Leverage your awareness.
What exactly happens to your body when you are angry?
Which body parts are warm?
Which muscles are tightening up?
Be as aware & curious as possible so you can understand that anger literally is:
Physical sensations + Perception, not reality.
Your mind gets to control your moves, not your emotions.
Tip # 3 – Have a Healthy Creative Outlet
A few years ago, if you were to tell me that anger makes you more creative, I would have laughed at you.
But a few years later, I would be lying if I didn’t notice the effects of anger on creativity.
Creativity is when your brain thinks on higher thought frequencies.
When you are calm & relaxed, you are thinking on a regular thought frequency.
But when you are angry & you spark a hidden side of your imagination.
Most people are not aware of this because they use that imagination to plan out a retort, throw a temper tantrum, go into road rage etc.
But if you can hold that anger & channel it on a creative channel, you’ll notice yourself producing on a surreal level.
Whether it’s writing, painting, building a speech, you will notice anger can often make the quality of your content skyrocket.
Your content becomes a lot more unpredictable & you captivate in the process.
Tip: 4 – Be Healthy with your Anger
The best way to be healthy is by getting your ass to the gym or playing a sport.
A few weeks ago, this dude cut me off in traffic & flicked me off.
I was extra heated because I was following the speed limit, was already having a bad day & was minding my own business.
I was so close to tailgating him & cutting him back off, but decided it wasn’t worth it.
A few controlled breaths later, I was now at the gym. Don’t remember exactly what I was working out, because everything felt like a blur.
Your boy was lifting heavier & ultra focused.
I had reached a state of flow that felt like therapy.
The feeling of anger didn’t go away, it was simply used to lift weights.
Use your anger to lift & power up. You’ll realize that anger is your body’s pre-workout, coffee, Red Bull & so much more.
Note: For tips 3 & 4, I gave you a vehicle to channel your anger on.
You never want to bottle your anger for too long.
When you bottle your anger, you recondition a negative perception towards it.
And the negative perception grows over time.
An emotion that you try to bury goes to the gym & comes back 10x strong.
Have a channel to release the energy on.
Tip 5- Force a smile
A smile changes your mindset & emotions.
The next time you want to really blow up on someone, try smiling.
You’ll notice that you feel a sense of ease.
Also, you will maintain frame.
Understand this major life concept:
The person being angry or trying to make someone angry loses social value.
The person who remains unaffected maintains and/or skyrockets social value.
You understand this life principle the more you mature.
And the smile low key rattles the other person who is trying to make you made.
- Maintrain frame.
- Exercise a positive perception towards anger.
- Enhance social value.
The smile is a no brainer.
Leverage the Tips to Control Anger
One major thing that you’ll learn in the emotional intelligence world is that anger will never go away.
However, your perception towards it will change if you bring awareness to it.
Use the 5 tips in this post to change your perception towards this emotion.
Rather than letting it take you on a downward spiral & make some silly decisions, aim to build with it.
You will find that a lot of your most unique creations will come from your anger.
And each time you produce when you feel this strong emotion, you take a little bit more control over your reality.
Those small fragments of control, allow you to build momentum.
And the momentum will snowball into sigificant life changes.
Leverage your anger.
And level up your emotional intelligence along the way.
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