Raging Bull & Teddy Bear: How Polarity Leads to Excellence

Raging Bull & Teddy Bear: How Polarity Leads to Excellence

The Following Story is from the ArmaniTalks Newsletter

From what I’ve noticed in history, a lot of great people had maniacal personalities.

The type of personality which would scare you.

 

This person would get in your face, call you out & say your work was subpar at best.

 

This great person was often balanced out by a soft teddy bear.

The opposite personality would pick you up and be like:

‘Don’t worry, he talks to everyone like that. You’re doing a great job!’

 

2 examples of this are:

-Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak

-Michael Jordan and Scottie Pippen

 

Steve Jobs was known for his intense personality.

He’d get in your face and say your work sucked.

He was known to be a binary thinker.

Either you were a:

Genius or bozo.

 

Wozniak on the other hand was a big teddy bear.

He was shy and more laid back.

He was quick to build others up.

 

The Jobs and Wozniak dynamic allowed them to take over the technology world.

 

Michael Jordan was a fierce competitor.

Not only would he trash-talk his opponents.

He’d trash-talk his team just as much.

 

Scottie Pippen, on the other hand, was the guy who would pick up these bruised teammates and be like:

‘Don’t worry, Jordan is just passionate.’

 

The Jordan and Pippen dynamic allowed them to take over the basketball world.

 

Society has changed a ton.

I’d say society is a lot softer now.

They preach kindness too much.

 

When they preach kindness a lot, they vilify toughness.

 

They’ll say stuff like:

‘Yea, Jobs was great… But he wasn’t a nice person.’

 

And Jordan was scared of The Last Dance documentary coming out because he wondered if he’d be perceived as an asshole.

 

In that polarity of toughness & kindness is where greatness is born.

 

If you’re only tough on someone, then you’ll ruin their confidence.

They will walk on eggshells around you.

 

But if you’re too kind to someone, then they will get lazy & more entitled.

Seen it time and time again.

 

In this current society, toughness is vilified.

If you’re tough, then you are seen as a menace.

 

However, I understand Jobs and Jordan’s rationale.

‘Why weren’t Jobs and Jordan kinder though? Couldn’t they have gotten the same amount accomplished?’

That’s not a guarantee…

 

The reason they were hard on others was because they were hard on themselves.

Both Jobs and Jordan had a sense of urgency.

 

Jobs thought he was going to die young.

Therefore, he felt rushed to execute his vision.

 

While in Jordan’s scenario, the sense of urgency was due to his profession.

1 basketball year is like 7 corporate years.

Most basketball players retire at age 33.

So, better make each year count!!

 

That sense of urgency made them a tough presence to be around.

Although it may have hurt feelings, it produced results.

 

In this era, we live in a much different atmosphere.

Being too tough on others can lead to a coup.

Others are more sensitive nowadays and have wayyyy more options.

 

If you’re too tough on them for too long, then they will stop getting back to you or will quit.

 

‘What then?’

To be a superstar, the goal is to be a hybrid of:

Jobs and Wozniak.

Jordan and Pippen.

 

Rather than 2 different personalities.

1 person has both personalities (when needed).

 

If you were tough on someone because they were on the verge of missing deadlines, then be kinder the next week if they ended up meeting the deadlines.

Take them out for lunch.

That’s balancing out toughness with kindness in an interval of 1 week.

 

I have my new book, The Art and Science of Storytelling, coming out soon.

The initial cover was shit.

So bad that it made me mad!

 

Had the guy redo it….

Then he gave something even more trash.

 

Had him redo it again.

He apparently ‘re-did’ it.

But I barely noticed any changes.

 

His urgency was slipping.

 

So, I had to go tough on him.

Let him know that the cover looked like trash.

 

After being blunt, he took the tough love and regrouped.

Within 6 hours, he gave a stellar cover.

 

After the stellar cover, I told him that it was phenomenal.

Kind mode: activated.

 

This is an advanced move by the way.

It’s best to have a rapport with the person beforehand.

And evaluate what type of person they are.

 

If they are hypersensitive, calling anything they do ‘trash’ is not smart.

But if they are normally gifted & need a splash of cold water to the face, then a sudden burst of toughness will WAKE them up.

 

Greatness is born from being a raging bull and a sweet teddy bear.

Behind that polarity is when the extraordinary becomes ordinary.

 

For more short stories on communication skills and love languages, be sure to sign for the ArmaniTalks Newsletter!!

 

– ArmaniTalks 🎙️🔥

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