How to Connect People Like a Winner
‘Is networking and connecting the same?’
No.
Networking is when you are trying to make yourself known.
Connecting is when you are trying to make others known.
When someone pictures a charismatic person, they immediately think:
- Someone who knows how to tell jokes, break the ice, and be the center of attention.
On the flip side, a lot of charismatic people are lowkey.
They don’t need all the attention on them.
This is a great trait of someone who can connect.
In this article, you will get an introduction on how to make an introduction.
Power connectors are powerful forces in the social skills world.
Allow us to learn how to become one.
Connecting Mindset
Connecting people is a lot like recommending a book to someone.
Me going to a friend and saying:
‘Hey, you should read this book because I liked it.’
Is not a compelling reason for them to read the book.
On the other hand, let’s say I am well read.
I see that this person is struggling with connecting other people.
In this case, I’d say:
‘You should read this book called the Power Connector by Judy Robinet. She breaks down how to connect people.’
Point being, we need a few variables to connect properly:
- Know people.
- Know what people need.
Example of Connecting
Let’s say I’ve written plenty of books and know the entire writing process.
From creating the manuscript, to editing, to proofreading, to cover design, etc.
I meet Sally.
She is an upcoming author.
She is a great writer, but an awful designer.
I know that my graphic designer, Zeg, is looking for more clients.
And he is gifted with creating compelling book covers.
I introduce Sally and Zeg.
From this connection, all parties win.
Sally gets a book cover made.
Zeg gets money in his bank account.
And I get the pleasure of adding value.
In the social world, the law of energy exists.
The energy you put out there is the same energy that comes back.
Even if you don’t collect a referral fee or anything like that…
That energy will be returned to you in another form.
Which Medium Should You Choose?
There are multiple ways of connecting others.
It can be done in person.
It can be done digitally.
Or it can be done with a blend of both methods.
Where you digitally introduce each other to see if they will vibe.
If they vibe, then they meet offline.
I’m here to tell you that the medium does not matter too much.
Focusing too much on the medium will make you lose focus of the bigger picture.
‘What was the bigger picture again?’
Create a connection that leads to a win-win.
- Emails.
- Group messages.
- Live meetups.
They are all pointed towards the same goal.
And that’s creating connections.
What to Do if Someone Introduces You
When someone introduces you to someone else, it’s smart to keep the initial connector in the loop.
By doing this, the connector can connect you to more people in the future.
A past client of mine once introduced me to a guy he met at a networking event.
Let’s call the past client of mine, Tom.
And the guy he met at the networking event, Joseph.
Tom told me that Joseph wanted to make videos on LinkedIn.
But he was camera shy.
Luckily for me, Tom and I worked together on that exact service.
So, Tom recommends that Joseph check out my services.
In my initial call with Joseph, nothing solidifies.
He was curious about the service, but not committed at the moment.
We talked for a few, then wrapped up with some final words.
2021 begins and Joseph hits me up again.
He emails me:
‘Armani, I’m ready.’
Once his payment came into my PayPal, I message Tom and was like:
‘Thanks a lot for the referral, Tom. Joseph and I decided to work together.’
After getting the update from me, Tom sent over 3 more referrals!
Therefore, it’s smart to hit up the initial power connector and give a confirmation that the interaction went smoothly (or not so smoothly).
What To Do Next
‘Okay, now I see what connecting is about. What do I do next?’
Just keep your ears open.
I wouldn’t set goals like:
‘I am going to create 40 new connections this year!’
That gets you too outcome-focused.
You will be tempted to create a connection more for ego’s sake than for relationship’s sake.
All you need to do is sit back and keep your ears open.
Normally, behind other people’s whining, you will see an opportunity to make connections.
I had a friend who was whining about how he didn’t know much about websites.
He wasn’t too sure of how hosting, web design, and domain registration worked.
Good.
I have a WordPress guy for that.
Behind the whining, I got the idea to introduce him to my website guy.
You don’t want to connect in a way where it will make your life harder.
I know my WordPress guy has a team, he’s not a solopreneur.
But if he was a solopreneur, then me giving him additional work will take away his attention from my site.
There are complexities that form every now and then with connecting.
But the main thing to look out for is creating a relationship where all parties win.
Yourself included.
Book on How to Connect People
Networking is about making yourself known.
Connecting is about making others known.
Master both skillsets, and you will forever create opportunities out of thin air.
The cool thing with social skills is that there is order behind the chaos.
If you can perceive the order, then you will be able to systematize social skills.
Judgment will skyrocket!
In my book:
I share how to perceive the order.
In this book, you will learn more about:
- Breaking the ice with strangers.
- Creating engaging small talk.
- How to spot a snake from a loyal friend.
- How to connect people.
- 4-D Listening skills.
And many more other topics.
Be sure to grab a copy of the Charisma King here!!
– ArmaniTalks 
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