The 9 Signs of SUPREME Social IQ
‘Social IQ, is that even a thing? Show me the test for it!’
Okay, relax there, buddy.
In the world of social skills, street smarts are engaged.
A person with elevated street smarts doesn’t go asking for tests all the time.
They understand the value of intuition and gut.
In today’s post, I’m going to break down one of my popular tweets which is:
The Signs of Social Intelligence.
Be sure to follow me on Twitter if you don’t follow me already.
Each of these signs are valuable when you are trying to make an impression.
Get these right & you’ll find others being magnetized to you.
Let’s go through each one with a detailed explanation!
Sign 1: Trustworthy
I don’t know your belief systems.
Nor do I care.
But I will tell you this.
Life is better when you factor Karma into the mix.
Karma is measured by:
- Did you make a decision with the grand system in mind or yourself?
Every now and then, we move selfishly.
That’s the nature of the mind.
However, if we can keep training the mind to not be a scumbag, it will be a long-term win.
I know someone who is smooth.
Can create a conversation with anyone.
Funny as hell.
And rising daily in his field.
Only problem?
He is a well-known scumbag.
His short-term wins are now leading to long-term failures.
His lack of trustworthiness is making him a liability to work with.
Be trustworthy.
Live up to your word.
When you don’t live up to your word, be the first to acknowledge it.
That’s how karma works in your favor.
Sign 2: Able to Create Small Talk
You may not like small talk.
I know a lot of people don’t.
However, small talk is necessary.
‘Why is small talk necessary?’
Because it creates the foundations for the interaction.
It’s difficult to jump into a conversation with a stranger and start talking about the meaning of life.
Some may be down for that.
However, others are going to be like:
‘What the hell?’
View small talk as stretching before lifting heavy at the gym.
Lifting heavy from the get-go will lead you to pull a muscle.
Speaking about deep topics from the get-go will lead you to come off as awkward.
Instead, start off light.
Create foundations.
The goal of small talk is to find the similarities between you and the other person.
Gear your questions like that.
Even if you find no similarities at the end of your interaction.
I guarantee you’ll know the person much better.
Sign 3: Able to Create Nuanced Conversation
This is the graduation from small talk.
If you’re making small talk the entire time, then you missed the point.
Become a charismatic person with depth.
That’s what social IQ is all about.
In my book Charisma King, I talk about how social intelligence & self-development go together.
Anyone who separates the 2 is a fool.
Because without self-development, you become too focused on the tactics, rather than the purpose.
Social intelligence falls out of living a life filled with purpose.
This allows you to seamlessly create nuanced conversations about a variety of topics.
And the topics you don’t know about?
It’s easier to fall back and ask questions.
JOIN CONVERSATION SKILLS CLASS FOR DUMMIES
Sign 4: Remember Names
‘Why do I keep forgetting people’s names?’
How often do you use the name once you get it?
‘Uh…’
That’s why.
Not using someone’s name after you got it is like buying seasoning, but never using it on your food.
Yuck!
On the contrary, using the names too much may be weird.
Therefore, view names like a seasoning.
Let your body be the guide.
When the body is the guide, you’ll develop an intuition for what feels right & when you’re overdoing it.
But the key to understand is:
Remember names by using names!
Sign 5: Can Have a Big Circle, but Chooses for a Small one
From the entire list, this may be the most confusing.
Why a small circle?
Contrary to mainstream sayings, popularity is not measured by how big the circle is.
A big circle often leads to surface-level relationships & more betrayal.
From my experience, the better strategy is to have:
-A lot of acquaintances
-Few friends.
Friends are the nucleus.
Acquaintances are the valence electrons.
Acquaintances are people you know on a surface level.
The surface level is not bad by any means!
The human brain is not meant to know everyone inside and out.
Friends are the handful of people that we have connections with & go through the ups & downs of life with.
The nucleus leads to emotional stability.
Not being able to distinguish friends from acquaintances is the reason for loneliness.
Sign 6: Observation to the Small Details
Know this.
Remembering the small details will allow you to remember the big details.
Remembering the big details does not guarantee that you’ll remember the small details.
People with high social IQ remember the small things.
It’s the information that others don’t notice.
If someone mentioned that they were going in for a job interview 2 weeks ago…. then immediately transitioned to another topic.
Then in 2 weeks, the socially intelligent person will ask:
‘How’d the interview go?’
The small details also train the mind to be more creative.
The more it is looking out for the small stuff, the less time it has to worry about social anxiety.
Social anxiety often happens when the mind is focusing too much on itself.
Instead of focusing on the other person.
Sign 7: Gives Thoughtful Compliments
A compliment is invisible.
However, it holds power.
It’s capable of charging up someone else’s nervous system.
But there is a catch!
Give laser-like thoughtful compliments.
A compliment is good when it’s personal to them.
And it’s personal when it’s specific.
If you just say:
‘Hey, good job.’
That’s way too general.
But if you say:
‘Your ability to stay focused for so long while maintaining enthusiasm makes you irreplaceable. Good job.’
Now the person will feel the compliment in their nervous system.
Also, if you lead people, know how to give compliments.
People like it when you praise their skill.
People love it when you upraise their work ethic.
Sign 8: Laser-Like Listening Skills
Many people can’t listen properly because they don’t know the difference between hearing and listening.
‘I thought they were the same?’
Nope!
Hearing is physical. Only the senses are engaged.
Listening is physical and mental. The mind and the senses are engaged.
Listen better by getting curious about the other person.
Get more curious about the other person by thinking that they know something that you don’t.
This knowledge they have can shift your perspective forever.
Therefore….listen astutely.
Simply by creating this narrative, you don’t try to listen.
Listening just happens.
Try it out for yourself.
JOIN CLASS TO BUILD LISTENING SKILLS.
Sign 9: High-Level Empathy
Empathy is a word that has been highjacked in the mainstream.
It gives the vibe of coddling & crying with someone.
Not quite.
Empathy is to see yourself in someone else.
This allows you to perceive unity before diversity.
What do you and the other person have in common?
‘Uh…’
The bodies are different.
The content in the minds is different.
However, you guys are both aware.
The awareness unites the 2 of you.
By perceiving the unity first, it’s easier to empathize.
Also, empathy leads to less anxiety & fear.
Anxiety and fear are often caused by a feeling of separateness.
But when unity is perceived first, it leads to a more enjoyable experience for both parties.
Level Up Your Social IQ
Social IQ can be trained.
It’s just a game of finding what you need to improve.
After going through these 9 signs, hopefully, you’re capable of seeing what you are strong on.
And what you can improve.
Solid social skills allow you to build a social asset out of thin air.
At the core of every subject, you’ll run into people talking to each other.
Communication skills are primal.
Level up your way with words.
Looking for a head start?
Then be sure to check out the Confident Communicator Bundle & Level up your Social IQ!
GET HERE
– ArmaniTalks 
